Advice For The Boys Part I

I don't know much about the intricacies of men (what goes on in those minds?!)~ but hey, I know what my girlfriends and I like. We've had fifteen years of dating them, after all. I know what we look for, what we swoon over and what turns us off in a microsecond. Sometimes, we wish we could make a list and hand it out to all the boys we meet and date, a sort of To Do/Not To Do list. Dating and love is a funny thing but here's a girl's point of view...

1. Let's start slowly here. Own a pair of Converse Chuck Taylors. Girls love those shoes (and I love them most of all). Don't get them in a juvenile pattern or colour. Navy, black or grey will suffice. Invest the $50. They are low in price and high in style. Pair them with nice jeans and a button down shirt or edgy tee. Effortless cool. Nice dress shoes are also incredibly sexy. Swoon.
2. For that closet with your nice jeans and Chucks, invest in a gorgeous coat. This will preferably be a classic navy pea coat or a duffel coat (toggle front, hooded, camel, grey or navy only). A good quality coat will set you back a few hundred dollars but will remain in your closet for years. Plus, girls love a good coat. Trust me, we notice. If you come to pick us up for a date in a nylon windbreaker...? Just don't.
3. Know how to chit chat. Yes, it seems impersonal and lame but we need to know you can sustain the conversation without bringing up the weather. Seriously, it's a skill to make small talk but small talk often turns into genuinely getting to know someone and what they're about. We also need to know that you can ask us about us, ask good and insightful questions and are interested in something other than talking about yourselves. Trust me, being inquisitive about who we are goes a very very long way. Major points scored this way.
4. Be sweet without being creepy. Be thoughtful without appearing overbearing. Compliment a girl genuinely. We appreciate it. Hugely. A $10 bouquet on a fourth date? Just do it. Know how to romance in the 21st century. We all want a romantic guy... but don't act like a girl. It's a fine line. If you're thinking of making a romantic gesture for a girl you're dating, ask a girl friend. And ask for the truth. Bottom line, girls seriously crave romantic gestures. That's why we date in the first place. Come on, guys, step up.
5. This should go without saying, but sadly, it doesn't. Don't criticize (even if joking), don't make us feel self conscious, don't talk about your exes (ever ever ever, unless we ask and only then, mention very little), don't text or talk on your phone while with us (it's rude), don't ignore us if we're meeting your friends for the first time and try very hard not to look at other girls when we can catch you. Oh, and don't say to our face that you hate cats/dogs if we have said cat/dog. Just keep your opinion to yourself.

Like I said, I'm not some dating or relationship guru. (I could laugh at that thought for days) All I know is what I like and what my friends like and the boys we naturally gravitate to. No guy we date has to be perfect but if you're a jerk, trust me, we'll walk away.
Hey, a little advice can't hurt, right?

Stay tuned, boys, for more posts on a girl's point of view.

(Photo via Vi.sualize)

Baby Got Back

You know that corny old saying, "I hate to see you go, but I love to watch you leave"? Okay, I kind of love it! It's trite but what girl doesn't love being watched (ogled?) as she struts away from a guy who is admiring her? These dresses make sure an exit is a beautiful thing in itself!

Lately I'm obsessed with the back. A bare back is strikingly sexy and often unexpected. There is nothing quite like wearing a dress that is fairly conservative, almost prim, in the front and then when your back is turned just so, a wall of skin is exposed. You can practically hear jaws drop! In these show stoppers there is no need to display anything else or to even accessorize. The best view is the one you'll show when you're leaving. Just make sure you take an extra trip to the powder room on date night to give the poor guy something to drool at. 

He won't stand a chance. 

Helmut Lang's Back Strap Dress, $460US

(love the short haircut, but if your hair is long wear it up)

Kiki de Montparnasse Scoop Back Dress, $225US

(love the embellished tights here)

Alice & Olivia Exposed Back Dress, $242US

(the turtleneck front makes the low back extra dramatic)

Top Dress: Lace Tiered Tie Back Dress by Caroline Hedaya, $495US

(my fave~ it's lace!)

(Photos via Shopbop)

If I Were Going on a Date This Week....

...then I would wear this dress by Rachel Pally, found on one of my absolute favourite fashion websites, shopbop.com. I'm passionate about white~ it is always my first inclination, whether I'm shopping or in my own closet. My favourite pieces in my wardrobe are incomparably my white dresses and I am literally awaiting the day when I can throw a white party (my 30th perhaps?). I adore this dress because of its overall Grecian Goddess effect~ the empire waistline, pleated bodice and gathered straps are hopelessly romantic and feminine. The strappy, flat sandals are the perfect compliment to the Goddess effect, though I would probably add swingy gold earrings as well. Many girls are scared to wear white, most likely because it's not as "slimming" as black and yet this silhouette would be flattering on anyone. Plus, white is far prettier on the skin because it reflects light, unlike black which absorbs light and can make you look drained. I would throw this little number on for a third date, but not before, and only if he really earned it! Anything this adorable needs to be pulled out only if he's a catch! 

I'm sincerely considering this dress for my 30th birthday.  What do you think? Is a White Party in order?

Visit shopbop.com here. I also LOVE this website because three of their gorgeous models are redheads so I can already see what the clothes look like with my colouring! Bonus!  

Date Night in the Summer

Summer is almost here... when the sunshine stretches late into the evening and the best dates are the laziest, most relaxed ones. I've been on some lovely dates in my time, in and around Vancouver, and my favourite ones of memory are always during the sultry summer months. My advice? Grab your guy and head out for one of these outings. None of them will break the bank and perhaps they will be as magical for you as they were for me.

1. Choose a clear summer Saturday. Have a late dinner in Kits (perhaps Hapa Izakaya at Cornwall and Yew or Watermark overlooking the beach). Following dinner head towards the Planetarium and instead of visiting the bigger attraction opt for the smaller Observatory, where a trained professional will direct a massive telescope to the night sky and show you any number of incredible visions. When I was there I got to see Saturn, a collapsed star and a meteorite, among other amazing things. Admission is by donation (open only Saturdays) and the experience (in the dark, tiny room) is both romantic and entertaining. Afterwards, hold your honey's hand while strolling around Vanier Park and smooch along the shore. 

2. Pick any warm evening, pack a blanket into your car and put your bathing suits on under your clothes. Make sure to grab your passports or birth certificates. Head to Highway 99 and then divert towards the Ferry terminals. Bypass the boats and instead cross the border into Point Roberts, Washington (the border line up shouldn't take more than a few minutes). Once you're in the great, excited States make a pit stop at the Market Place to stock up on everything you need for a yummy picnic~ the deli has yummy and greasy fried chicken, spicy wedge potatoes and (best of all) corndogs (there is also healthier fare, if you insist) and a shockingly decent wine selection. Don't forget to bring me back Red Vines, I beg you! Take your picnic down to the beach, spread out your blanket, eat and splash in the cool ocean. If you're lucky (I was, once or twice) you may see whales going by. The beach is normally fairly deserted and private so you may not see anyone else around. Completely magical, inexpensive and romantic. 

3. Splurge on tickets to Bard on the Beach (this year's offerings include Othello and The Comedy of Errors). Watch the magnificent theatre, perhaps munching on the sweet and salty mixture popcorn (yum, best snack ever). Afterwards (if you passed on the popcorn or even if you're just still hungry) head over the bridge to downtown and indulge in a sweet treat at Marble Slab Creamery on Denman at Davie. You will fall in love with this gourmet ice cream, guaranteed. Quote lovey Shakespeare lines to each other as you get your sugar high. 

More fun summer dates to come! Enjoy, lovebirds! 

Chivalry~ Dead or Alive?

Don't get me wrong. I love men. LOVE 'em. However, lately I've been wondering this~ is chivalry dead? I sincerely hope not but it seems incredibly hard to find chivalrous behaviour in the average man these days. Perhaps this is a ridiculous generalization and yet I spend my days being cut in front of by men (definitely no ladies first any longer), ignored when a friendly smile is offered (um hello, it's a smile, I'm not asking for a marriage proposal!) and I don't even remember the last time a door was held open for me (if ever). I often wonder how it was being a woman 50 years ago~ what was "courting" like? How did men truly treat women? Did they buy flowers (without being ordered to!)? Has chivalry gone out with the times as women have become men's equals in the professional world?

I had all but given up hope when something restored my faith a few weeks ago. I was helping a man at the store, giving him inane advice on what to buy friends as a wedding gift (he took my brilliant advice) and as his gift was being wrapped he went to have breakfast at a dive I recommended. Later when he returned to pick up his purchase he came to thank me and gave me a truly lovely bouquet of flowers. I was completely moved. There was no ulterior motive, no phone number left or requested. It was simply a gesture, a thoughtful kindness. This stranger made my day and weeks later I still think of that sweet and generous man out there and how lucky one lady will be to have him one day. So, boys, if you're reading this you may think about holding open a door even once in awhile, or buying your girl a bunch of tulips or running her a bath after a long day (or even better, a back rub!). A friend recently reminded me that chivalry isn't dead, it's just hiding a little more these days. Look hard enough, girls, and it's bound to reveal itself. Or it will if the guy is worth it!

What do you think? Is chivalry dead?

(Photo courtesy of Paper Tissue)

If I Were Going on a Date This Week....

...then I would wear this! J.Crew's embossed cotton ombre Lorelei dress is right on trend for summer with it's pale blue bodice fading into a perfectly knee length white hem. The strapless neckline is always pretty and feminine but the flat, gold sandals makes the outfit a little more casual, not too fussy. The pockets are an added bonus! So cute, plus a place to hide your lip gloss! Add a cute cardigan for night time or a light shawl for your shoulders and a choice gold accessory, like this model's chunky bracelet, and the look is flawlessly pulled together. It's a perfect second date choice~ you're trying but not too hard! Drool worthy, I think. Visit J.Crew.com for more perfectly sweet dresses and other summery outfits.  Another added bonus~ they ship to Canada! Hooray!